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The Stages of Grief

by ESKI

supported by
Jon
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Jon Brilliant. Real. Raw.

Beautiful Favorite track: Nice Guy.
Plectranthus
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Plectranthus This might sound redundant. But it's so nice to hear a voice that understands... Then overcoming those emotions to create with them something so beautiful. Your work is truly inspiring. I'm sorry for your pain, but I'm glad it happened. Favorite track: Tethered.
christabelle
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christabelle True work of *art.
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
Raw.
Heartwrenching.
Poetic... Favorite track: Pronoia.
/
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1.
We built a castle of iron and sand We stack, we tear down We love with our hands It all felt cosmic as it fell into place The moon hung heavy and we hid in her grace We built a castle towered in the sky Enshrined each other turned water to wine They heard our sermon the moon changed her phase The water swelled up and it took away A world of us
2.
Nice Guy 03:15
In the room where you left me there are stains in the carpet The exit wounds of loving you You were armed and unspoken And I leave our tiny apartment wondering "why cant you stick around?" but you can't help it that you're violent in all of the ways you let me down. This is what your guilt looks like when you hide under our bed The bloody mess of rorschach tests you will never hurt me again like you said you wouldn't, like you said you could. And I leave our tiny apartment wondering how I could love you right but you can't help it that the only way to be the nice guy is with lies. And in the room where you left me there are stains from all my open wounds but you can't help it makes you happy watching someone bleeding over you
3.
He felt like nothing I've known like there's so many years left to grow We planted all of our love in our bodies we shared as a home And if he could stay I'd promise him all of the flowers that bloom inside me Worth the long wait through cold winter days when our bones break to blossom in spring The frost dug into our garden real deep on a December day So he armed himself with a shovel to kill them before they were slain And if he could stay I'd promise him all of the flowers that bloom inside me but he couldn't wait through long winter days when our bones break to blossom in spring And if he could stay I'd make a bouquet of the treasures that gardening brings but he couldn't wait through long winter days when our bones break to blossom in spring
4.
Tethered 04:07
I still love you as a stranger you're burried so deep in me When you say you hope I'm well I'll take it offensively I feel like I'll bleed forever and still feel you in my bones Wound too tight to come untethered etched in skin I can't outgrow And if you love me, why'd you leave me? I turned into something wrong Something trapped inside the attic in a home I dont belong
5.
Pronoia 05:12
I cannot keep living in the shadow of someone you used to love But I watched you set fire to perfect parts of me with ashes left to keep My stretch marks remind me of the pain it takes to occupy more space Maybe I can love myself when I'm not busy loving someone else You've been disenchanted, how am I to feel? How much of me was real? But I live in this body, I must build it up I'm mine, to burn, to love And maybe that's the way things have to be a forest fire to reacquaint the seed And maybe I can love myself when I'm not busy loving someone else

about

The stages of grief are as follows: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. They aren't linear, they aren't romantic, and they aren't cathartic. This album is the creative aftermath of a failed relationship. It took me a year to live and a year to write as I tried to compose each song while I was experiencing the stage.

credits

released March 19, 2017

Written and recorded by Stevie Lorann
Recorded and produced by Landon Echeverio

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all rights reserved

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about

ESKI Portland, Oregon

A small woman making music in Portland, OR.

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